When Your Kids Leave Home and Nothing Feels the Same

Thinking of all my friends whose kids are moving out, heading to college, joining the military, or simply stepping into the next chapter of their lives.My heart is with you.

I know the mix of emotions you’re feeling: deep pride, excitement for their future, and a pain that’s hard to put into words. Even though we’ve always known this day would come, it still feels like it came way too fast. And let’s be honest, sometimes it feels like your heart’s been ripped out and stomped on. Scratch that-it feels more like a Mack truck ran over your heart a million times.

I remember the pain in my chest every time we hugged and kissed our kids goodbye, then drove away, leaving them alone in this big, scary world. The drive home without them is the absolute worst. I can still cry today just thinking about it.

Yes, they’ll come back home. But it won’t ever be quite the same.

None of this feels fair, and that’s okay. Please, allow yourself to feel everything. You get to. For the past 18+ years, this has been your life. Every moment, every milestone, every tantrum, every car ride, driving, picking up, helping with homework, kissing boo-boos, friends hanging out at the house, sleepovers, heartbreaks, and celebrations.

So yes, take time for yourself. Cry. Sit in the quiet. Do whatever you need to do. When I dropped off my oldest 7 years ago, I crawled into bed and cried for at least three days. And when the middle child left, you’d think it would be easier. Nope. I cried for days all over again.

And here’s the part I don’t want you to miss: just like your kids are spreading their wings, you are about to grow new ones too. This isn’t just a new season for them, it’s a new season for you.

And I can’t wait to see you fly. But first, you get to cry.